Free Kittens

I got a fever, and the only cure is 20 dead babies sitting on my porch

One time I found out Canadians can’t speak unicorn

Pastries don’t appear out of nowhere

Let them eat booty

Speaking words of wisdom, “I like cereal.”

Eating chocolate to bond

Dancing provocatively to “Zip-a-dee-doo-dah”

Come on over, illegal Germans

Fighting a Dell

Taking pictures of rabid squirrels for Instagram